Triggers are purposeful and healing intel when we allow them to show us what we need to see/integrate.
Rather than be afraid of them, push them away, wish they never happened, try to tie toe around them, argue and change each other over them… we can be thankful and allow the feeling in our awareness, and see where our attention goes as we feel it. What stories come up? Notice how it feels and shift accordingly.
I’m not always clear right away why I feel what I feel, but it is my intention to tell less story about it and be with it directly so that it may clarify.
This is why it’s better to sometimes process on my own VS share inaccurate stories before it’s clear, unless the two people have developed a nuanced communication of “noticing” what arises without labeling, with a strong foundation in direct experience/Awareness that can see through illusion of story, and refine storytelling so that it is a more accurate description coming from that direct experience. In this way two people can effectively process triggers together and evolve our stories to a more accurate, free, and expansive pov on ourselves/reality as it authentically is.
And so triggers are directions back to ourselves when respected properly.
I realize I said some things about bre sending a bad message and placed judgements, but I’d like to revise it and say I understand she was expressing her perception and feelings, and I feel for her confusion, anger, and pain. Her description of the events is also as I saw it, and from my pov it’s not “lying and deception” as she says, but rather we did not know and I saw you doing your best to communicate as you knew how to. Therefore I don’t feel relevance to engage her with a response at this point in time as you work things out with her directly.
Thank you for understanding re not bringing up Bre unless you specifically request it. That feels good.
Love to you and bre in both your healing and clarification of authentic desire and true self.
Stoked to be creating with you! Feels good to focus on taking the steps when we chat next.